Shirley Belair Funeral – 2 Corinthians 4:11-18
Quite a while before I moved to Minnesota, I saw a video – of a certain tongue-in-cheek, humorous character – about the Minnesota “long goodbye.” The video was ostensibly introducing people from other states – who might visit or move to Minnesota – to this aspect of Minnesota’s culture of cordiality.
It recounted how, when guests in Minnesota begin to hint about leaving the home they are visiting, their hosts try to talk them out of it: often offering another cookie or piece of cake, or another cup of coffee, to lure then to stay. Then, when the guests finally do leave the house, their hosts walk out with them to the car, continuing the visit, and maybe then beginning a new conversation about the car, or the weather, or something else.
Everything in the video was in good humor. And since I’ve lived in Minnesota, I’ve seen and experienced some aspects of the Minnesota “long goodbye.”
For example, when I would visit Shirley at her home, and after I had shared God’s Word and sacrament with her and Vernon, I would begin to hint at being ready to leave. And at that point Vernon would almost always offer me another cookie or another cup of coffee.
When I would visit Shirley at the Elim home – with Vernon usually being there as well – when it was time for me to leave, he would want to walk with me down the corridor, would sometimes go down the elevator with me, and would walk with me all the way to the outside door.
During these long goodbyes, the visiting continued, the hospitality continued, and the companionship continued. The goodbye was not a quick wave of the hand, followed by a fast getaway.
It was a prolonged process. But finally I did leave, as Vernon watched me go from the door – having accompanied me as far as he could.
In a more serious way, Shirley, for the past several years, has been engaged in her own version of a “long goodbye”: not from a visit to a Minnesota home, but from this world. She had a serious bout with cancer several years ago – which, fortunately, she did survive. But after that, her health and strength in general began to deteriorate.
Over time, she gradually became ever more limited in her activities, ever more weakened in bodily strength, and ever more tied down to her home: unable to do many of the adventurous and fun things she used to enjoy doing. And after a while, it was no longer possible for her to attend church, which had always been a very important part of her life.
Shirley always knew that Jesus was God’s Son and her Savior, and that he forgave her sins, promised her eternal life, and guided and protected her in all the ups and downs of life on earth.
Being able to gather with fellow believers in his house – to hear his Word, to receive his sacrament, and to sing his praises – was a cherished blessing. Losing the physical ability to do that, was a difficult and sad change.
But just as with the Minnesota long goodbye, so too with the more serious “long goodbye” that Shirley was engaged in: even as she was, in a certain sense, slowly withdrawing and departing from this world; she was also, in a very real sense, still embracing life – joyfully and optimistically.
Her life was still filled with love: especially love for her high school sweetheart turned husband, and for her children and grandchildren.
Her love of nature, and her desire to enjoy nature, likewise continued. She watched through the window, with much delight, as the birds came to the bird feeder. She watched with less delight as the squirrels also tried to steal as much birdseed as they could.
And her love for Jesus Christ also continued. When she was no longer physically able to go to church, her pastors brought church to her. First my predecessor, and then I, visited Shirley and Vernon, to share with them an encouraging message from Holy Scripture, and to administer Holy Communion.
In these ways God’s pardon and peace in Christ remained at the center of Shirley’s life, and continually renewed in her heart an eternal hope. On these visits we claimed and believed the promise of our Savior that where two or three are gathered together in his name, there he is among them.
But eventually, Shirley’s long goodbye from this world did culminate in her departure. She, as it were, finally walked through the door, and finally drove away.
Literally, she fell asleep, and didn’t wake up – until she woke up in the heavenly presence of Christ and all his saints.
But you know what? Even if it might not be as obvious as it was for Shirley over the past several years, we, too, are also engaged in a long goodbye: as we move, ever so gradually, toward our eventual departure from this world.
All members of the human race, because of Adam’s fall, are conceived and born in sin. And along with the sin, comes death. As far as life in this world is concerned, therefore, we are all mortal.
We are all on a pathway toward physical death. Even as we live, we are all also having a long goodbye, away from earthly life.
But the Christian gospel, when it enlivens your heart and enlightens your mind, takes away whatever fear and anxiety might be attached to this inevitability. All of you who know Christ, know that on the other side of death is life again: an immortal, resurrection life, guaranteed by Jesus’ own resurrection from the grave.
Someday our souls and bodies will be reunited, and we will live forever in the new heavens and the new earth. The Book of Revelation says of those who trust in Christ now, and who will be with Christ then – in that future time beyond all time – that
“God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away.”
And, there will be no more goodbyes. St. Paul writes in his First Epistle to the Thessalonians that “we shall always be with the Lord. Therefore comfort one another with these words.”
And additional words from St. Paul can likewise comfort us: as we mourn the fact that Shirley’s long goodbye has now come to an end; and as we soberly ponder the long goodbye that we and all people in this world are still engaged in. We read in the Second Epistle to the Corinthians:
“Therefore we do not lose heart. Even though our outward man is perishing, yet the inward man is being renewed day by day. For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory, while we do not look at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen. For the things which are seen are temporary, but the things which are not seen are eternal.” Amen.